Jonespeak 2010

Last Christmas, Nathalie sent our family a card and included a list of cute conversations and funny words coined by her three boys.  I loved the idea and decided to keep a list for my family for 2010.  It’s great to have such memories recorded for posterity (and embarrassing wedding speeches). Without further ado . . .



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Hair cup = hair cut

Fustache = mustache

Manfa = Santa

Lympic Porch = Olympic Torch

Slivers = lizards

Lawfers = lobsters

Doosed ( i.e.  My friend doosed that) = Does

Hurted = hurt

Reared = read

Fruck = frog

Suvway = subway

Breakaful = breakable

Yego = Lego

Earmocks = earmuffs

From The Mouths of Babes:

BA:  Sam, it’s time for bed.

Sam:  No fanks.


BA:  Oh no, Jack.  I am too old for that.

Jack:  You’re not old mommy.

BA: How do you know that?

Jack:  Because you’re too pretty.


BA:  Sam, please stop.  Don’t do this . . .  etc., etc.

Sam: (covers his hands with his ears) Mommy, this hurts my ears.


BA:  Jack, I am so sad that you are growing up.

Jack:  Don’t worry mommy, I will grow down for you.


After hearing glass shatter, Sam squeals:  “Ta Da!  I did it!”


Jack:  We’re getting a new baby so we don’t need Sam anymore.  Let’s throw him the garbage.


Jack:  Ask daddy he has money.

Paul:  How do you know that I have money?

Jack:  Because you work.

Paul:  How about mommy, does she have money?

Jack: No.  Her job is to look after us and she doesn’t get any money for that.


Paul and BA discussing baby names. BA to Paul:  How about Bram?

Jack: Uh, no!


Sam, screaming at the top of his lungs:  Look there’s Santa!

(The man he was referring to was a burley looking biker with white facial hair.  He did this yet another time referring to a scraggly bearded homeless man.)


Jack: Does Terry Fox live in the woods?

BA: No.  Why?

Jack:  Because that’s where foxes live.


BA: Sam should I read this book to you?

Sam:  No.  Reared it to yourself.


Sam runs up to a zoo worker and full of excitement says:  I farted!


And we will never forget . . .

  • The two months that Sam wore his pajamas.  Every day.  All day.  Everywhere.

What are some funny things your kids have said this year?



11 thoughts on “Jonespeak 2010

  1. Beth Anne!

    This is hilarious! And what a great idea. Starting in 2011, I am going to do this as well.

    Thanks for sharing!

  2. from the book of kind-of funny, but not too funny, was, in the silence of the 6:30am drive to hockey practice Saturday, just Grady and Brock. 6 year old Brock pipes up from the backseat with the question: “is fuckin a bad word?”…Grady, riled out of the 6:30am haze, says “excuse me, where did you hear that”…oh some kid at school, he’s in Grade 2, and i scored on him playing mini sticks yesterday, and he said fuckin hell”…
    So enjoy your little mispronounced words for now Beth Anne – they don’t stay innocent for long!!!

  3. well just the other day my grandson said to me after i got into the car with him that i had a big round red spot on my face. i still have no idea if he was talking about a small mole like thing or my blush. my blush was certainly not a big round red thing, i am not that old!

    oh and i think i can say this on here because know one that i know will see it. in wal mart the other day i thought my daughter in law seemed really tired, extra grumpy and just not right somehow. her back was hurting and sometimes her side. finally i said are you ok? you just don’t seem right. now the good part! the telling of the secret. the secret that was supposed to wait until christmas. hehe. my five year old grandson looked up from the end of the buggy where he was hanging on, looked me dead in the eye and said very seriously, shes pregnant. oh my gosh i have been waiting and waiting and hoping and hoping for that! i thought it would never happen. so you could have just knocked me over with a feather. but then she wanted me to keep the secret and from her mother whom i talk to all the time. i am so glad she finally told her. now to keep it from my family!

  4. When my eldest was two, my husband dropped a glass in the kitchen and it shattered. We were in the next room, but his effort to restrain himself was practically palpable, even without being able to see him. But then out came the profanity that he just couldn’t hold in. From the two-year-old, “Mommy, why Daddy say Godfukkydamma?” Fortunately she did not repeat that question on Grandma’s next visit…

    I love this list of misspeaks. Also inspired by Nathalie, we’ve started keeping a list of them in our house. When my husband’s laptop died a sudden and catastrophic death in the summer, we paid a pretty penny to get that one file retrieved.

  5. Pingback: Jonespeak 2011 « 4 Mothers

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