Most years I am a reasonable winter trooper – no wild enthusiast, but I like it and I get out. I like the change of seasons, the prettiness of it, and the forced slowing of the pace of things. I don’t know why exactly, but I haven’t been able to rally to the call of winter this year. Possible explanations: it’s been colder than usual, I haven’t been exercising, and especially I think is that it’s been not just a very cold winter but a very dark one. To plan my garden better, I am supposed to observe sun patterns throughout the seasons, but despite my efforts I still don’t know where the sun falls in the yard because it won’t shine! I’ve been missing the light terribly.
And maybe that’s why it’s been happening, the low energy that seems to be so often nipping at my heels this season, so much so that one Sunday I found myself at home for hours because my husband had taken our children out for the day. He knows I need these windows to recharge, but though I was so glad to have it, I kind of found myself flopping around, not doing any of the things I know I want to do.
Enter the distraction: I have discovered (four years later than the rest of you but whatever) Downton Abbey. And being late to the show, I can watch episode after episode online if I choose. And although it’s great fun, I did feel a bit defeated when I started downloading the next episode during my precious window of free time.
As it turned out, the iTunes episode took 20 min to download. And rather than sit there doing nothing, I turned to my mending basket thinking, at least I’ll sew up that hole in my sweater while I wait. It was a small repair that took just a few minutes.
But it was something, a little shot of productivity, and I found myself thinking, hey, maybe I’ll make a hand lotion like I’ve been meaning to do for about forever, even though I knew it would take longer than the time left on the download. And I actually did it – melting beeswax on a makeshift double boiler and everything (a big dealio for yours truly).
And when night came, following the day that I had wanted to have, I returned to that downloaded copy of Downton Abbey and it was great.
I totally hear you about this winter’s blahs. I’ve been so lethargic, and the new year usually gives me a ton of energy to try to tackle the upcoming goals for the year. But this year, nothing. Now, my doctor has given me medical reasons for this, but even my brain seems to be inactive. So celebrate the small steps! I know I do!
I think that’s what I got from that Sunday… to not worry so much about the grand plans and get on with the little things that lead into bigger ones. I hope you’re able to recharge too, with whatever help you need including, as you say, celebrating the bitty steps.